YuYu and the points dont matter
by Egyptian Rose
Summary: Finished! YYH Whose line is it anyway. Botan is the hostess. i was bored one day.I hope it's funny...Weird Newscasters, Whose Line, Super Heroes, Scenes from A hat, Let's Make a Date, Restricted lines, 90sec alphabet, Party Quarks, and Hoedown
1. Chapter 1

Star: I could not resist, I love these shows. I don't own Whose line or Yu yu.

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"Welcome to "Whose Line is it Anyway" lets meet our contestants, When Life gives you lemons make Kazuma Kuwabara! When Pigs fly it's Yusuke Urameshi! Rain Drops keep Falling on my Hiei! The grass is always greener, its Kurama. I'm Botan your Hostess come on down lets have some fun." Botan Walks down to the desk and sits.

"Good Evening everybody, welcome to Who's line is it anyway where everything's made up and the points don't matter, that's right the points don't matter Just like Kuwabara's opinion, it just doesn't matter."

"Hey." Kuwabara says

"What we do is have these four act out whatever's on these cards." Holds up blue cards, "they have never seen the cards before. Then at the end of each game I give them points, I don't know why, its just a gag to hold the show together. And at the end of the show we pick I winner that has nothing to do with the points. The winner gets to do a little something special with me and the loser has to wash the elephant."

"Are we ready?" Botan Looks down at the first card, "Weird newscasters. This is for all four of you." The boys get up and move into positions, Hiei is stage left, Kurama Stage right and Yusuke and Kuwabara take the stool in the middle.

"Okay, Yusuke you are the News caster and these three are your co-anchors. Kuwabara you are a Rapper. Hiei you are doing sports and you are pregnant With Yusuke baby and are trying to convince him that he is your baby' daddy." Botan busts out laughing along with the audience.

"Onna I will kill you." Hiei says

"And Kurama You are doing the weather and you are a deranged stalker who has been stalking Yusuke for some time and is ready to strike." Botan said, " Whenever you're ready begin!" The music starts.

"Welcome to the 5:37 news, I'm Always Upforit. Today's news, there have been reports of a stalker and a pregnant man roaming the world. Lets see what else is out there, I hand it over to Queereye Forthestraightguy, Queereye?"

"yo yo yo, diss is yo news caster Queereye. Whatchu want me to say, I rap diss way all day, wanna make something of it, then ! It!" crosses he arms over his chest and nods like a rapper.

"Okay, That's great… I need a new job." Yusuke mutters, "Lets take it over to Sunny Afternoon for the sports. Sunny?"

"grr, Right, today all the teams lost and,,," Looks at Yusuke, "You! You did this to me… you bastard," Walks over to him and places his hand on his belly. "How could you leave us?"

"Riiiight. Now for the weather with Pocket Fullofposies, Pocket."

"Oh don't try and change the subject." Hiei says.

"Today we are looking at a chance of…There he is." Kurama points at Yusuke, holds up a fake pair of binoculars, "now its time I got him." walks over to Yusuke and Pushes him out of the chair. "Got you. now that I have you…" looks evil then beams, " Can I have your autograph?"

**BUZZZ BUZZ BUZZZZZZZZZ**

"That's Great Guys five points for all of you, except for Hiei, he gets six point. Now For" Looks down at the card, Whose line, this is for Kuwabara and Yusuke." Botan hands them two strips of paper each and they put them in their pockets. "And Kuwabara you are the little mermaid and Yusuke you are Eric trying to convince her to live on land with you. Begin."

Kuwabara Pretends to be swimming around, "Oh the sea, I hate my home, there has to be something more." Looks up and sees Yusuke, "Oh Eric."

"Arial! Before you go there is something I want to say to you." Yusuke says, " and that is something that is etched into my heart…" pulls out the strip, "Drop it like its Hot!" he reads

"That's nice, but Eric, my father told me that I can't be with you, he said if I saw you again to tell you that," Pulls out a strip and reads, "Now That I've seen that on TV, that is the shizzznipe!" Kuwabara says.

"Please come away with me, I got a tattoo for you and it says, "Red Bull gives you wings." Reads that last strip.

"That might be but I cant. But I wrote you a song, its called, "Grr release the monkey!"

**BUZZ BUZZ BUZZBUZZZZZZ**

"That's great okay, more when we get back from the break."

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Shishi walks out, "do you want to look as beautiful as say, Me? Well you cant, but you can come close with this." Holds up a bottle of perfume. "Only I million payments of a dollar."

* * *

"okay we're back, with Whose line is it anyway, the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter, That's right the points don't matter just like toothpaste to a C class demon." Botan says, "our next game is Super heroes. Okay I need a name for Yusuke."

"Richard Simmons man" Audience member 1

"Cupid boy!" AM2

"Captain Cow"

"Okay Cupid boy and a crisis?"

"the world is out of love."

"Okay, Cupid Boy, the world is out of love, what are you going to do?"

Yusuke walks in holding a fake bow and arrow, "Oh no, the world is out of love, I sure hope my super-friends come soon, I better call them," Shoots up a fake arrow.

"I came as fast as I could." Kurama runs in,

"Thank god you're here." Shoots Kurama with a fake arrow, "Pokemon boy!"

"What is it?" Kurama says turning an imaginary hat. "gotta Catch'em all"

"Hn. what is it?" Hiei walks in

"it's Captain Care bear." Kurama said catching imaginary pokemon.

Hiei growls, "oh my what I nece sunny day, I care about that."

"Okay Guys I am here now, don't panic." Kuwabara jumps in

"Hn. its, Village idiot man."

"Durrr, all you gotts to do is shotsss de peoples with you awwors." Kuwabara said, "Hello." Leaves tripping over the step.

"Hn. I am going to care for someone now." Leaves.

"Oh yeah I got ten badges," leaves.

**BUZZZ BUZZZ BUZZZZZZ**

"No points, that was a none scoring round." Botan says and the audience gets sad. "Okay Hiei and Kurama get to have all of Yusuke and Kuwabara's points." Smiles and waves. "see you after the break"


	2. Chapter 2

"Welcome back everyone, to Whose Line is it Anyway." Botan says and smiles at the camera as she pulls out Koenma's JR hat. "Okay at the beginning of the show we asked members of the audience to pick suggestions, we put the best ones in this hat and our performers have to act them out, Okay guys come on down." Botan says as the guys move onto different sides, Kuwabara and Yusuke on the left side and Hiei and Kurama on the right.

"Okay," Botan pulls out a postet, "things you don't usually hear from your wife."

Yusuke walks out, "Its okay, go out with that hooker just make sure you get your money's worth." walks back to his side.

**BUZZZZ**

Botan shakes her head and pulls out another, "things Hiei does when no one is looking." Botan snickers lightly as Hiei growls.

Kuwabara bolts out first and looks around making sure the coast is clear, imitating what Hiei would do. "La lalaalala, it is such a beautiful day, I think I will frolic through the flowers." Kuwabara skips around and goes back to his side is he is buzzed.

Kurama walks out and smiles, "one day I will tell the world that I love my friends and care about them…I am making these valentines for them right now" Pretends to cut out valentines."

Hiei Walks out taking Kurama's Place…"Now is my chance to kill all three of them"

**BUZZZZ**

"Hiei, that's not very nice." Botan calls and pulls out another, "Things that should not be shown on Television."

Kurama Pulls out Hiei and Kuwabara and Pushes them together in a small kiss. Hiei and Kuwabara pull Away Spitting and wiping the kiss away.

"Yep that should not be shown on TV or even done in life…" Botan Winces

Yusuke laughs as he comes up and starts Striping. "I'm to sexy for my Clothes…" Sings and Botan Buzzes him. "What?"

Botan shakes her head, "Okay last one." Smiles then laughs at what the card says, "Things you don't want to say to a deranged psycho killer"

Yusuke Walks out and Pulls out Hiei, "Here, kiss my Friend…" Points at Kuwabara and Hiei growls.

Kurama Walks out Pulling Hiei out…

"Are you guys saying that I am a deranged Psycho killer?" Hiei asked, "Well I am not deranged."

"That's right I am the man who slept with your wife…" Kurama says to Hiei

**BUZZZZBUZZZBUZZZZZZ.**

"That's Great. Okay our next game will be Lets Make a Date. This is for all four of you." Botan says, "Kuwabara you are on dating type show and the others are the bachelors each one has been given a strange quark or identity, you have to guess who they are."

"Hello Bachelors." Kuwabara says in a feminine voice "Okay Bachelor Number one, I enjoy long walks one the beach, what do you enjoy?" Looks at Yusuke and waits

(Obsessed barber who loves Hair as he would a woman) "I love to… Cut it and keep it …" looks at Hiei's hair and beams, "Ooh" Strokes Hiei's hair.

"Okay, Bachelor Number two, if I was a glass of milk what type of cookie would you dip into me?" Kuwabara looks at Kurama and smiles

Kurama reads his card and frowns then gets into character (washed up rack star trying to kill himself in imposable ways) "My song you are my Oreo was a number one hit." Pretends to cry, "oh I am done with this" Throws his hands in the air and pulls out an fake spoon, "with this spoon I end my life" Sticks it in his eye.

"Okay then, haha you are silly, Um bachelor number three, Roses are red Violets are purple, if you were a vegetable what color would your hair be in the summer time?

"It wouldn't be red!" Glares at Kurama and jumps out of his seat and walks up to Kurama and pulls on his hair. (Hates the color red and wants to see it die)

"Ow…" Kurama winces as Hiei yanks a little too hard.

"Um, Right, Okay Back to you bachelor number one, same question." Kuwabara asks Yusuke

"Hair? Did you say hair, I love hair, and this red hair is so pretty." Yusuke also pulls on Kurama's hair.

"Bachelor number two what is your favorite song and will it be ours?"

"Pull harder! Here I come god…" Flinches as his eyes tear from being pulled by his hair

"I don't think I will be picking you. Last one, number three when I was born my mother said that I was the ugliest thing in the world, if she were where right now, what would you say to her to defend me?"

"Actually I would agree with her and tell you that you are the ugliest thing even now…" Pauses and looks at Botan who has a red ribbon in her hair. "It must die"

Botan sits back in shock having forgotten that she is wearing the ribbon, "Now Hiei, its only a game show, I didn't make you…Koenma did…" Jumps as he pulls the ribbon from her hair letting it fall as he burns the ribbon in his hands. "Oh, Hey Hiei, that was my ribbon now what am I going to do with my hair?"

"Leave it down." Smiles and walks back to his stool.

"Umm, okay." Botan blushes and shakes her head, "Okay Kuwabara can you guess who they are?"

"Urameshi is a hair crazed person?"

"Okay but what kind of people deal with hair?"

"Barbers. He is a deranged barber?"

"Yep."

"Kurama is…a suicidal Person and he is doing it wrong."

"Yeah I'll give you that one."

"And the shrimp is someone who hates red things."

"Yeah okay." Botan smiles and pulls out another card, "Hey our next game will be restricted lines (v-v I forgot the real name) in this game Kurama and Hiei will only get to say two lines and Yusuke can say anything he likes." Botan explains as they take their places, "Kurama your two lines are "Are we there yet?" and "that cant be good" Hiei your lines are, "Yo Mama!" and "Get down!" the scene is you are in a toy store trying to get the newest toy before it is sold out. Okay begin."

Yusuke Points to an invisible stand through the doors of the store before it opens, "Okay the toys are right there and as soon as the doors open we split up and try to…"

"Are we there yet?" Kurama asks

"No, I have to finished the plan so…"

"Yo Mama."

"Okay there is no need to bring mothers into this. Now can I finish the plan?" Yusuke asks irritated, "Like I was saying when the doors open we split up and find the fasted route to the toys got it? Okay ready? Let's go."

"Are we there yet?"

"Hurry before…"

"Get Down!" Hiei yells pointing at a fake crowd of people.

"Ah, Watch it! okay Kurama since Hiei is busy I need you to get the last toy, right there." Points.

Kurama shakes his head, not wanting to go, "That can't be good"

"Just go."

"Yo Mama!" Hiei shouts as he shoves away fake people.

"Oh no there goes the last toy." Yusuke pouts

"That can't be good"

"No, it's not good! We just missed it, no thanks to you two." Yusuke frowns

"Yo Mama." Hiei holds his hands out and an invisible toy falls into his hand

"You did it Hiei, Awesome! Lets get out of here." Smiles

"Get down." Starts to dance

Kurama points at Hiei's dance and frowns, "That can't be good"

**BBUUUUUZ!**

"Okay a trillion bazillion gazillion billion million and one points to all of you!" Botan blows a kiss to Hiei and waves back at the cameras "Okay we are going to commercial, see you later."


	3. Chapter 3

Hello all. Okay I am going to write this differently because future tense is messing my past tense up. So without further adieu I bring you Whose Line, Yu Yu style…

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**Botan:** Hello everyone and welcome back to Whose Line is it Anyway, the show were everything's made up and the points don't matter. (Looks down at the cards and smiles) our next game is 90-second alphabet. This game is for Yusuke, Kurama and Hiei. 

**Yu/Ku/Hi:** (walk down to center stage)

**Botan:** What they have to do is act out a scene but they are only allowed to start a sentence with the next letter of the alphabet starting with the letter…

**Audience member 1:** U!

**Botan:** the letter U. Okay and your scene is… You are all stranded on an island with 50,000 fangirls. Anytime you are ready, Begin.

**Yusuke:** Under there! Hide! (Looks behind him as if the girls are chasing them.)

**Hiei:** Very smart detective. (Says with distain)

**Kurama:** What are you two doing? (As they hide)

**Yusuke:** (points at the girls behind him) X marks the spot!

**Hiei:** O.O' you are an idiot.

**Kurama:** (points before them) Zebras! Lets ride them to safety. Oh but there are only two.

**Yusuke:** (points at the same spot Kurama did) Ass. (They get on the fake animals.)

**Hiei:** Baka, lets just go.

**Kurama:** Can't you go any faster? (Talks to his zebra)

**Yusuke:** Don't rush me.

**Hiei:** Enough! He wasn't talking to you.

**Kurama:** (looks behind him as they ride) F- (blinks and smiles innocently) I would never say that.

**Yusuke:** Good God! They're catching up. O.O

**Hiei:** How will we get out of this one?

**Yusuke:** Just stay here and let me get away, they like you two more anyway.

**Hiei:** Know what? You are starting to get on my nerves.

**Kurama:** Look, we don't have time for this.

**Yusuke:** (whines) My Ass broke. (Falls behind)

**Hiei:** Never say that again, Detective.

**Kurama:** (stops his Zebra and gets off) Oh No!

**Yusuke:** (gets off of his donkey and run to them) P? Please tell me, we are not surrounded.

**Hiei:** (looks around) Quarter! (Points to the ground hoping to use Yusuke as a distraction and sure enough he dives for it)

**Kurama:** (shakes his head sadly) Reckless.

**Botan:** Ten Seconds.

**Yusuke:** (pretends to get jumped by the girls) S-stop! Ah! No…

**Hiei:** Time to go, Kurama

**Kurama:** Undoubtedly.

**BUUUUUZZZZZZZZZZZ!**

**Botan:** Okay Fifty points to anyone who's name starts with H. (looks at her next card as they sit down) Okay one of my personal favorite games, Okay Yusuke, Kuwabara, Hiei will be given a strange quark or identity. Kurama you will be hosting a party and you have to guess who they are, so take center stage. And you three go off to the side and I will bring you in one by one with the doorbell.

**Boys:** (do as they are told and as Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Hiei read their card Kurama prepares)

**Kurama:** (pretends to be on the phone) Yes mother, don't worry it will only be a few friends. (Cringes) No I will not invite Maya! (Shutters) yes, I love you too. (Hangs up)

**Botan:** (Ding Dong)

**Kurama:** (opens the door) Come in. (smiles)

**Yusuke:** (( Maya)) Charges in H-Hey… Eee! Oh my god, thanks for inviting Me…

**Kurama:** Y-yeah sure. (opens the door again as the doorbell rings) Hello?

**Kuwabara:** ((A frog trying to be kissed so he can become a prince)) Ribbit! Croak! (Gets on the ground and hops around making a kissy face)

**Kurama:** (Opens the door again) God help me… Come in,

**Hiei:** ((A variety of T.V commercials)) No Obligation. Call Now! (Walks in)

**Kurama:** so glad that all of you could make it.

**Yusuke:** (on the phone) Oh, MY. GOD. I am at Shuichi's house. He is so hot. We are going to get married and have lots and lots of kids. (Hangs up and screams)

**Kurama:** eheh…

**Yusuke:** (hugs Kurama tightly) come on Love. You know you want this. Oh I just love you to iddy biddy pieces. My snuggle bear.

**Kurama:** (pushes him off) Okay then (moves on)

**Kuwabara:** Ribbit…. (Jumps up and Kisses Yusuke and stands up straight) I feel pretty. (Looks at himself) Oh yeah…

**Kurama:** Okay Frog prince…

**Botan:** (buzzes Kuwabara out)

**Hiei:** (points at Kuwabara) We all do dumb things, paying too much for car insurants shouldn't be one of them.

**Yusuke:** (bites his finger looking at Kurama)

**Hiei:** (walks up to Yusuke and pretends to be holding something in his hands) You put the lime in the coke, you nut.

**Yusuke:** Oh man I have wanted you forever Shuichi… EEEEE!

**Kurama:** I thought I didn't invite you, Maya!

**Botan:** (Buzzes Yusuke out)

**Hiei:** (whispers) Zoom Zoom. (Runs around)

**Kurama:** Okay, Hiei is umm, Television Commercials?

**Botan:** That's right. (**BUZZZZZZZ**)

**Audience:** (Applause)

**Botan:** Okay, 5000 points to Kurama for being so smart. No points to Kuwabara for kissing Yusuke. 5 points for Yusuke who let Kuwabara kiss him and Ten million points for Hiei, because I never knew he watched T.V.

**Botan:** We are going to go to a commercial and when we get back we'll find out who the winner is.

* * *

**Suzuka:** Where are my pictures! Beautiful Colors (makes a rainbow of color) take it from the Beautiful Suzuka, and I mean beautiful. Kodak pictures right in the store. Just enter, Click and print. Ahahahahaha!

* * *

**Botan:** and we are back, and Hiei is the winner. Now the rest of us are going to play… HOEDOWN!

**Audience:** (cheers)

**Botan:** Okay what we need is the name of a group of people you wish you could understand.

**Audience member 2:** Preps!

**Audience Member 16:** Gangsters!

**Audience Member 6:** Girls!

**Botan:** Okay Girls. You will be doing the girls hoedown. Played by Yukina on Piano and Keiko on guitar. (The music starts to play)

**Yusuke:** Girls are really scary, Girls are really fine. When I try to touch one, they always try to run, I guess I should worry, I guess I shouldn't fret, cuz I'm gonna get lucky with one I just met.

**Kurama:** Girls can be a hassle, Girls can be a chore, they always chase me all around, They think I am a whore, I don't want a girlfriend and here is the pitch, the reason I don't want one: My last one was a bitch.

**Kuwabara:** I have a girlfriend, she is really sweet, she is very pretty, she thinks I'm very neat. When I try to tell her, just how I feel, she doesn't understand me, but my heart she did steel.

**Botan:** People always ask me, why I take so long, to fix my hair and makeup, they think I am quite wrong, but at least I am not like Yusuke and go out in a thong…

**All:** Go Out In A Thong!

**Botan:** Okay that's all the time we have for today.


End file.
